Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Naked in San Fransisco

No its not Photoshop - I wanted to release this Facebook picture with a accompanying blog post talking about this decision in some detail.

Naked pic of me in San Fran

Yes, I decided to walk naked in San Fransisco and sit in the infamous Jane Warner Plaza.

This post was partly motivated by the fact that SF is now moving to ban public nakedness according to a Reuters article on the topic.

So the back story starts about 6 months ago while in San Fransisco following a conference I participated in. While casually strolling down the street, I noticed a man walking towards the financial district, Naked! I was awestruck, as was everyone in his vicinity yet their surprise took the form of some fairly loud comments such as: "you have nothing to be proud of" and "look at his small di*k." Yet, the 30 something man continued to walk as though he didn't hear it or didn't care.

This experienced reinforced two things in my mind: the first being the value we place as a society on physical appearance or attributes and the second emanating from the shame we feel of our own bodies.

To understand this for myself, I look to my experience teaching Media Literacy which basically consists of critically analyzing the media messages that surround us while realizing that through these catchy words and phrases they are trying to instill values, wants, and desires within our minds. I've come to realize the power of those messages and the effect it has on our societal consciousness as well as its use for judging others. Take this Superbowl commercial for example

What values are being encouraged?

How should we value women based on this commercial?

What body types/races are the women in this commercial?

It is also important to take into account that the average Superbowl commercial will cost almost 3.5 million according to ESPN and have an estimated 90 million viewers. These commercials represent the most well thought out and targeted marketing attempts in history, yet they often focus on objectification of women, money, or alcohol (bud commercials).

What effect does this have on how we view our body and the bodies of others. If these commercials focused on the fact that everybody is different and not everyone falls into the picture perfect physique or is particularly well endowed, what would be the effect?

Question to ponder: If a woman was walking naked in the Castro would she be yelled at and mocked for having a inadequate body?

Contrary to popular belief, the male pecker is not 10-11 inches and cannot wrap around your waist or hang two inches from the floor. According to Dr David Delvin and well established studies "Most authorities now say that the mean length of the erect male organ is between 5.1 inches and 5.9 inches and while the non-erect penis usually measures between 3-4 inches (minus one inch for the San Fransisco wind chill)." So, to come full circle, I would pretty much bet my life on the fact that everyone laughing at the mans "small" pecker are not more well endowed then he, yet they feel the need to vocally attest to the inadequacy of his "package," and it was apparently something worth laughing at for some (what a confidence booster).

Being a member of this culture and and having grown up with this "shame" of my body implanted in my own brain, I thought to myself "I really want to do this, but I'm to ashamed." I simply looked on as he strode past me and down the street, turning every head in his vicinity.

In regard to the proposed ban, I understand that there are two sides. There are people who are genuinely distributed by the men and sometimes women collecting on a corner in the Castro district and creating a public spectacle. Maybe the ban is the best move, I'm not sure, but one thing I am sure of is that having enough confidence in your body to take off your clothes in front of other people and being willing to bear it all including your perceived flaws and inadequacies, takes courage. I experienced it when I walked out of the public restroom naked in SF, it will definitely be an experience I will remember for the rest of my life and I find it regrettable that people may not be able to do it in the future.

I would like to live society where we accept the difference of others and don't feel the need to put others down, especially for their god given bodies. Maybe then, I would have never felt the need to take of my clothes and prove to myself that I have nothing to be ashamed of.

Edit: I just wanted to add part of an interesting conversation that started with a facebook comment about this blog post.

A Facebook comment about my blog post - "Most people look better with clothes on. I tend to think there is as much an evolutionary reason that certain body types arouse our interest as there is a societal reason for our perceptions. Advertisers just use these psychological triggers to sell products. Societal pressures may push us towards healthy body types. It is how one goes about achieving an attractive physique that questions should be raised. It is a healthy nutritious diet and lots of physical activity that developes a beautiful body. But, we live in a sedentary world full of junk food. So we have many obsticals to overcome. And, we can survive quite well without the afore mentioned habits. In fact it seems that competition pushes us to forgo them. Thus the recent trend toward childhod obesety and a crippled and increasingly expensive health care system."

My response to the Facebook comment - "I understand where you are coming from Norman and I cannot deny the benefits of healthy eating and exercise as well as the consequences of a sedentary life yet one must also consider the fact that our perceptions about body types have changed with both our progression forward in history as noted in 16th century art ("Venus of Urbino" by Titian) as well as our changing views about diet and exercise. In regards to evolutionary reason for looking fondly upon a woman that would arouse interest (large breasts, small waist, and tanned skin), I'm not sure these characteristics would, in any way, offer a causal link to healthy offspring. Swinging the pendulum to the side of the common man, almost any male including the old and out of shape could produce offspring and maintain his bloodline, therefore fulfilling his evolutionary need to reproduce. So, what would be the evolutionary reason for our society to look favorable upon a man who follows a rigorous workout regimen and has a healthy diet? Chasing down wild game, or fighting off potential threats to his family? Advertising has also shifted immensely, My initial analysis came from my personal perspective as a man who takes great care of his body with daily exercise and a healthy diet, yet I was still ashamed of my body and feared what others would say about it and I doubt that I am alone in my perspective. It was gained, in no small part to what was reinforced through the media. Also, to delve a little deeper into the media base of this conversation, it is now evident that advertisers have used, and continue to use heavily Photoshopped images of women to sell produces. This image, having no basis in reality, continues to be perpetuated as what should "arouse our interest." If you are interested, I collected a movie clip featuring a dove marketing campaign (Dove Video) taking the viewer through the process of full Photoshop modification of a models face, moving away from just fixing blemishes and emerging into modification of eye placement and neck length. Traits that would be impossible to emulate. Moving away from the discussion of the evolutionary development of body type selection and more towards the fact that we favor seeing some with clothes on and others without clothes on in a pubic space; when the body serves a mere purpose of arousal or disgust, I believe it is a result of a societal reinforcement, including the influence of the media outlets, that brings us to tell someone that their body in inadequate for public viewing."

His second response - "I am a little ashamed of my naked body too; even though I try to take care of it. There is naked bike ride in Philly that I thought about doing; but then I just asked myself why? I couldn't come up with a good reason so I haven't done it. On the evolutionary aspect I tend to think that some features do indicate a healthy body which could in turn produce healthy offspring. I don't have scientific evidence to back this; but I am fairly sure it's out there. I am also fairly sure that they are just theories and not conclusive. Evolution seems to be a somewhat meandering path. It favors those traits which allow a species to adapt to its environment. And our environment is constantly changing. Also, evolution is a very slow process for us. The rest of this comes down to asthetics which are quite subjective. I am a photographer and know what is done with photoshop. I think that soon we will not have any actual true photographic memories of anything... I tend to think at some point in life we have to except who we are even if it is less than the media portrays. I tend to think most advertising, TV and movies are a joke and a waste of time which I try avoid. It always amazes me that people like to read People magazine. We are a nation obsessed with stars. Or we are have too much time on our hands. I don't blame the media becuase we have freedom of choice. I also respectfully disagree with you on the issue that societal pressure dictates what I find attractive. "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." One thing that hasn't been discussed is the issue of hygiene and I think that that is huge."

A third response from someone else - "I agree that we should not feel ashamed of our nude bodies, but I'm not convinced that your being naked in public will make others feel less ashamed of their own bodies. I know that if I get married, I will not want to compare my wife's body with other women's bodies. Likewise, I don't want my wife to compare my naked body to other men's. Seeing other people naked inevitably invites ranking and comparison, whether we want to or not (I'm also anti-pornography). I'm glad to live in a city where if a man shows his genitalia to a random woman on the street, he can get arrested and charged as a sexual offender"

My response to both responders -  
Norman- "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder," yet the rose colored glasses we wear are surely not of our own making. Personal preference is something which cannot be denied yet we must also take into account that it is a collective spectrum of preference that we can choose from within the confines of. To illustrate this, if you were to conduct a study where a number of single "average" American males were instructed to choose a appealing women from group of 5, one of which would be a Karan tribal women from the Red Karen people (famous for neck stretching), I could almost guarantee she would continue to be the outlier in every selection. I’m sure the reverse would be true for a group of Karan tribal men. Why is this significant? It becomes evident that you choose what you know, or what you’ve come to find acceptable. If you lived in America there are a plethora of influences guiding your choice of what you find appealing from clothes to body type. Although, you free to choose from within that limited selection or “box,” we should also recognize that we are making those choices within the larger box of cultural preference and In this case, The “American” cultural preference, which has its downsides.

Dan - My initial impetus for walking naked was solely for the purposes of waging a war with my internal feelings of bodily shame. When I think about the impact it could have on others I look back to the original Rueters article, which I linked to in my blog. The article addresses some points on both sides but what struck me was a paragraph about who decided to take off their clothes, “The nude protesters, including one using a cane and another in a wheelchair, walked with DiEdoardo two blocks to the federal courthouse.” This diverse group of protestors did not only include chiseled men and attractive women, it included people of all races and shapes from the handicapped to the obese, people who would not normally feel confident in their physical appearance. This motivates me to realize that my body is not something to be ashamed of and I believe that this will also motivate others. PS: I'm glad to have visited a city where a person, regardless of physical attributes, can display their naked body.
 






Wednesday, November 7, 2012

IS IT REAL?

"Jennifer wants to be friends on Facebook." This sentence greeted me as I logged onto my email, immediately followed by a queasy feeling in my stomach and a loss of appetite.

I don't think she will ever understand how painful this is. I cant be her friend. I loved her, I cant just friend her and watch her life progress without being a part of it.

If this were the matrix I would would beg Morpheus to stick the probe in the back in my head and erase my memory of our relationship. Its not that I genuinely don't still have strong feelings for her and think about her on a daily basis, its that I've become imprisoned by it. Just like when she told me of the rape a few months ago, I subsequently lost 10 pounds from my already thin frame and feel into a depression. I cant control her, and at times, she cant control herself. I cannot be apart of that, for my own mental sanity.

Why do I LOVE???????

Yet, words do no justice. This process is unfair.

Does this really have to last this long?

Does the pain really have to persist?

My heart yearns for her but my mind knows the reality of her lifestyle and the havoc it wrecked on my world.

What is wrong with me?

Can I not just make a decision and mentally and emotionally stick by it?

Why do these bouts of regret and longing slowly tear away at my emotional stability.

Jennifer, please......................CHANGE

*Edit: I can see why people turn to alcohol or drugs. Dealing with sadness and depression is a really tough and overwhelming process.