I've noticed, evidenced by the last post, that I have the capability to elevate my mood to a mania...and quickly. Being part of my personalty, I accept it, but I definitely realize its ramifications if not recognized and balanced with some type of in-the-moment analysis.
I've finished the book "the game" and did some online research. It basically breaks down to this, if you don't have the confidence in yourself, you will not be able to approach women, period. All of these strategies to seduce women, etc are based on the fact that the seducer (lonely man) now has some secret weapon that will allow him to "be interesting" around women at a given time/location. This is the placebo affect in action, if you believe you have less a chance of failure you will then take more chances. Its not the damn magic spell you cast on a women, its the confidence you gain to actually do more then stare at her as she walks by.
Knowing that I have some hesitations with approach, and would like to know more about the human psychological process in in regards to interacting with opposite sex, I will invest the next couple of weeks into doing some research and applying the skills I see necessary, but in my opinion, the best way to gain more confidence is get rejected countless times (hundreds) and lose the fear of the approach.
FYI: Considering dating classes range in the thousands of dollars (crazy, i know) do this shit yourself by working on your confidence, going to the gym, taking some speech classes, and growing a pair (easier said then done).
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Cross Roads
As my stomach turned, yearning to finish devouring the pages of "The Game," I soon realized that this book has the potential to change the course of ones life.
We all share one commonality, we have some type of foundation which we base our opinions, judgements, and decisions on. This foundation, being formed from various aspects such as the impact of our environment, peer group, family and friends, has become the identity we rely on to face the world. Any threat to this identity is compartmentalized by justifying your current set of morals/values because they are all you know.
"We need a foundation to base our life upon...I couldn't imagine myself just floating through life with nowhere to rest my mental baggage," he said, while lacing his climbing shoes. "True," but I had a burning internal desire to disagree, I could form a new identity, and I use the term identity loosely.
I've never been one to show emotion, at least outwardly, but this has created a cognitive dissonance greater then I have ever had to deal with in my life, almost bringing me to tears. I honestly immensely fear the impact this book can have on me. Since my youth, not being one to brag about my skill with the ladies, I forced myself to believe I was above these "popular" girls. I developed a personality of protection and made decisions that only served to bolster that.
Chastity, was my armor against these oncoming hoards that gave me no attention, these platoons of individuals to be envied, these popular people. I'm better then them, I told myself, I wasn't going to have sex because I didn't want to. Fuck that, I did, and I wanted to but I couldn't. It was my protection that lasted until my late teenage years, but remnants still hold true, refusing to tear off as I start accelerating through life.
I don't sleep around, I value a woman, and I'm looking for a lasting relationship, or at least that's what I tell myself. The desires of human nature escape no-one, I still face the sexual desires that every man does, and still marvel at stories of friends that have slept with countless women, but that's not me.
Do I
Do I
Do I
Do I want to change my moral foundation?
When one pulls the veil from the social programming that has constrained us since youth, we have a decision to make. Either accept and justify our programming and continue with our banal existence, or recognize the obstacle and take the necessary steps to obliterate it.
On a positive note, reflecting on the authors reinvention of his life, which took the sum total of about one year, it is amazing to contemplate the possibilities for change in any area of ones life in such a short period of time.
Question: If you were given a peak into a way of life, envied by others, including yourself, would you take the steps to embrace it or justify your current existence and make no attempt at change.
That my friends, is my mental flow.
We all share one commonality, we have some type of foundation which we base our opinions, judgements, and decisions on. This foundation, being formed from various aspects such as the impact of our environment, peer group, family and friends, has become the identity we rely on to face the world. Any threat to this identity is compartmentalized by justifying your current set of morals/values because they are all you know.
"We need a foundation to base our life upon...I couldn't imagine myself just floating through life with nowhere to rest my mental baggage," he said, while lacing his climbing shoes. "True," but I had a burning internal desire to disagree, I could form a new identity, and I use the term identity loosely.
I've never been one to show emotion, at least outwardly, but this has created a cognitive dissonance greater then I have ever had to deal with in my life, almost bringing me to tears. I honestly immensely fear the impact this book can have on me. Since my youth, not being one to brag about my skill with the ladies, I forced myself to believe I was above these "popular" girls. I developed a personality of protection and made decisions that only served to bolster that.
Chastity, was my armor against these oncoming hoards that gave me no attention, these platoons of individuals to be envied, these popular people. I'm better then them, I told myself, I wasn't going to have sex because I didn't want to. Fuck that, I did, and I wanted to but I couldn't. It was my protection that lasted until my late teenage years, but remnants still hold true, refusing to tear off as I start accelerating through life.
I don't sleep around, I value a woman, and I'm looking for a lasting relationship, or at least that's what I tell myself. The desires of human nature escape no-one, I still face the sexual desires that every man does, and still marvel at stories of friends that have slept with countless women, but that's not me.
Do I
Do I
Do I
Do I want to change my moral foundation?
When one pulls the veil from the social programming that has constrained us since youth, we have a decision to make. Either accept and justify our programming and continue with our banal existence, or recognize the obstacle and take the necessary steps to obliterate it.
On a positive note, reflecting on the authors reinvention of his life, which took the sum total of about one year, it is amazing to contemplate the possibilities for change in any area of ones life in such a short period of time.
Question: If you were given a peak into a way of life, envied by others, including yourself, would you take the steps to embrace it or justify your current existence and make no attempt at change.
That my friends, is my mental flow.
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